Growing up with a single mother,
she saw different Uncles popped up at random, Uncles she just saw once, Uncles
that kissed her mom in the sofa and those who even beat her in front of her and
it was debilitating. Her mum was torn between keeping her man and being a
mother to her child. As emotionally wrecked as she was, she lost the battle
between her man and her. They call it keeping a man.
It was especially difficult
because she was quite a smart girl who knew what she wanted right from the
inception of time. Even though her Mum’s boyfriend was a bully and always
wanted his way, the boring eyes of her makes him uncomfortable. He taunted and
schemed against her every day until he finally made sure she left home after
several unsuccessful rape attempts
Her mum was the new generational
type who would not opt for the pillow when a man can warm her bed. She was tired
of moving on; she was just tired of this man business. Life was not easy being
alone in this world. Had it been easy, her father would not have become a
rolling stone. He would not have been on the run. They all went through it;
after all she would go through it too. In their time, they were asked to move
on, they were even punished corporally but try caning your own child now and
you would have to be looking through the yellow pages for the best lawyer in
town. You have been charged with child molestation and abuse and getting a
hearing already.
Her mum looked on as her live-in boyfriend
molested the child even for offenses she didn’t commit. She thought her mother
was a piece of work to act like nothing was going on.
She did not have the chance to
enjoy childhood. The little girl in her was trapped in there, everything died
and the only thing that was left with her was just to increase the tally in age.
She felt sorry for the world that she even cautioned the world mentally to stay
off her case. She could hurt the world for making her become a shadow of
herself, for looking on while she turned a destitute.
She fought with gun wielding men
out there, fought with other women just to hook up a client and she did all for
survival. She needed to survive and that means rent, schooling, feeding,
clothing and all. She stayed away from drugs despite the level of exposure. She
decided to keep a clean head so she could be able to complete school. She was
determined to climb the social ladder and probably get to sit on top of
Maslow’s apex someday.
Life was one bad situation after
another. She had no one to talk to; everybody was a stranger to her. Her own
mum did not believe her for five continuous years when she was always
supporting her boyfriend against her, so why would she think that someone out
there was willing to believe her. At most, they will only express their sympathy
to you and make you feel helpless but she was too strong than that. She doesn’t
need anyone coaxing her to take a step a day at a time. They were just mantras
and clichés. She stopped crying the day she was sent away from home by her
mum’s boyfriend as her mom looked on without saying a word. She saw it coming.
She adopted the pussy power in
many situations and it worked for her. It’s a natural force women have used
since the dawn of time. She’s made many men become part of the statistics
because she had to be crafty and straight on, in getting what she wants. She
needed to make it; she deserved the chance to be educated like any other child.
It was the only way she can put her cynics to shame. She wanted to go back to
the community not because she had a home or to show off, but because a piece of
her has been buried there. That was where her go-gay life ended and it did, the
very day her Mom’s last boyfriend; her claimed Uncle came through their door. She
deplored the pussy power when employment slots were limited, in getting an undeserved
favour and getting her way through where men matters. Men will always fall to
the fairer sex and it’s been like that since the days of Adam.
Sometimes, she got what she
wanted without necessarily giving sex. She was not ridiculously hot; she still
was a decent girl with lots of ambitions. All she needed, to have things
playing her way mostly, is to be nice. She didn’t have her own definition of
what grace is and did not have any mentor to look up to so she decided to work
from within. She decided not to compromise on her ambitions and keep her head
up and to work on her inner self to boost self-esteem, the very and only weapon
she figured out she needed to survive and to also get what she wanted.
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